Story Time

Also known as Silver Linings When the NYC Public Transportation Fucking Sucks

Living in New York, I meet all kinds of interesting people. Which is to be expected. But today was an interesting situation.

I work in Manhattan 3 days out of the week and I work in the Bronx for the other 2. The easiest and best way for me to get to and from my work is the A or C line. And usually it’s totally fine. I mean, sometimes a train breaks down, and yes it adds time to my commute that I can not really afford since I’m paid hourly. But it’s never really more than I can handle. BUT TODAY. OH TODAY.

I got to the Fulton station no problem, in record time really. I ended up standing next to this pretty hot guy on the platform, who was getting pretty agitated as we waited for a downtown train. Something must have happened to the A line I guess because 4 uptown headed trains came and went before one downtown even got close to the station. With each train, the guy next to me was getting more and more annoyed (but in a hot way) and FINALLY an A Train pulled up to the platform.

I’ve seen sardine cans with more room than this train car. I mean, this was like those photos you see of the trains in Japan except there weren’t any train attendants there to help push everybody into the cars.

This is what was needed. Get on it New York.

As the doors opened, Hot Guy and I tried to worm our way in. I would have fit, I’m telling you I fit in that car. But the woman in front of me elbowed me in the stomach and literally growled at me before saying “There’s another train right behind this one”. I could have stayed in the car, but this woman seemed really aggressive, and getting home quicker was not worth getting punched in the face. So I got off the train and watched as this tall, skinny, older man tried to fit on the train. OH my gosh did this guy try. A for effort good sir, but there was no way you were going to fit on that train, were it not for Hot Guy. After this poor dude tried standing in the doorway of this train three different ways, Hot Guy graciously stepped out of the train.

As the train sped off, Hot Guy and I started speculating on when exactly the next train would arrive. We shared a few jokes about the public transportation in NYC and talked about our destinations. Turns out he was going to a birthday party, and I was headed home to spend time with my roommate for her birthday, which was a few days ago. After about 20 minutes of waiting (which is forever by NYC standards) another equally packed A train pulls up.

Hot Guy and I look at each other and agree that we WILL be getting on this train. The door opens, and the two of us make our way onto the train, Hot Guy being nice and letting me get on first. This car was so jam packed it hurt. I stood with my hand flat against the ceiling because I couldn’t reach any of the rails. Not that it mattered, I was sandwiched so tightly in a circle of people that I could have just stood there and I wouldn’t have gone anywhere.

Hot Guy got off on the next stop, wishing me luck and giving me a great smile. As he wiggled through the crazy crowd in front of the door, the woman next to me on the train said “I hope you got his number honey, cause he was FINE”

Unfortunately, I didn’t get Hot Guy’s number. And my actual experience was probably more interesting to me than it was to you dear reader, but I wanted to share it with you. Because it tells many truths;

  1. Even on the most stressful commutes, you can always find a silver lining or a reason to laugh
  2. I can flirt with another human without them realizing I’m really an alien from another planet
  3. I also have no idea how to ask a guy for his number
  4. NYC has the worst transportation ever

So there you have it boys and girls. A weird random story from my life with no real moral whatsoever. Tune in sunday for another actual blog update. And remember folks, The A line SUCKS.

Also Hot Guy who was wearing a grey suit with a blue shirt on his way to a birthday party at the bar- If you ever see this, we should grab drinks sometime.

Cheers y’all.

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